But man how true it is. Today I was dealing with two seperate situations. First of all one of my friends that I literly just came in contact with after almost 20 years. She and I where so close at one time we would tell people that we where sisters. But years have gone by and we lived seperate lives, seperate families. And today she took the first step in changing her entire life. She has decided to walk away from her unhealthy marriage. She is ready to make her life her own. Love and Marriage may go together like a horse and carriage however, they are far from the same thing. Being in love doesn’t always mean that you put up with being threated like you are less then important then your counterpart. It’s a give and take. It actually becomes more complicated at times. We are all guilty of thinking that everyone thinks like us. That they know your struggle, your pain and emotional ups and downs, when we get upset because our family and loved ones don’t read our minds. We also make facial expression that confuse one another, express different body langage and before you know it we are mad, sad, and in mid-confrontation, before you realize you have no idea why you are mad, what started all this. But what happens when you get to the end? To the point where there is no turning back. How do you go about starting over? Sometimes people think that it’s simple, yet they haven’t walked in the person’s shoes who they are talking about. My husband and I only faced one time when we thought that our marriage was at an end. And honestly it was because we were not communicating or being honest with each other. We also were having an issue with our drug addiction at the time and we were dealing with life-changing occurrences. There was a point in our marriage when I didn’t understand where he was coming from, and I thought that he was being unreasonable and accusing me of doing something that I wasn’t doing. He was confused because he didn’t understand why I wasn’t seeing what he was seeing and it stemmed from two people that we thought were our friends we considered them family and they tried to drive a wedge in between us tried to make us mistrust each other. Honestly I’m not for sure what their end game was, but they were hell-bent on us being apart. half of the people that I worked with and my second job thought that my husband was controlling and that he was hurting me. which was not true. People at my first job said that they saw him standing around a corner looking around checking on me making sure that I was at work or doing something I was supposed to be doing. When in reality he was making sure that I was okay he was making certain that those two people were not at my job harassing me or saying things about him. This was the time in my life when I let my husband down, I didn’t have his back, I believed other people who’s intentions were not good. And I am extremely sorry for that. Wesley and I have never had the type of relationship where we were jealous, didn’t trust, and we have never lied to each other. We never had a reason to. Even after Wesley was diagnosed with DID, we should have handled that situation a lot better. But we became stronger for it. Our family is more important than anything else in this world. Us going forward together is what matters.

My second friend, moved back to our home state from Arkansas with her husband of 12 years and his three children. But I can honestly say that the situation my friend went through was something entirely different than I have ever seen I have never had Wesley or any of the 37 personalities in fact speak to me the way my friends husbands spoke to her. He went as far as telling her that she ruined his life and he should have never trusted her. He also let her children speak to her like she wasn’t a grown adult. I do realize that they are living their life that what their marriage consists of is not my business but I just don’t understand how there are still women in the world who put up with things like that. I mean this is one of my best friends she is literally on the million dollar question blog that I have written about my best friends I have known her for pretty much most of my life half of my life at least we grew up in the same neighborhood went to the same High School matter of fact my mother actually let her stay with us when we were teenagers when she and her father or stepfather were having issues getting along and it floored me to see her letting first of all teenage children talking to her however they felt like they could and watching her husband not taking the initiative to make them mind or stop is this just me or is Love and marriage becoming so much different than it should have been.

I was raised in a single parent home. My momma took care of ever aspect of our lives. She held it all together without missing a beat. Without assistance from either of our fathers, or the government. She taught us to own our destiny and not depend on someone else to save us.